Read Patti's full transcript after the jump:
Patti thinks it won’t be long before these two are following their friend Nene Leakes’ lead down the aisle.
Patti hopes they master cloning so Justin can date himself, but she's ecstatic Michael let his inner nerd hang out.
Patti teaches Rachel to ditch the uber aggressive macho men and helps tough teddy Steve go for the beauty inside.
Patti can't believe "Vegas" Dave walked out on her mixer -- he couldn’t get a quality girl in a million years.